Bond of friendship
http://www.deccanchronicle.com/tabloid/sunday-chronicle/other-realm/bond-friendship-806#.Tj6Ugr31iVU.emailAugust 7, 2011 By Mrinalini Shekar
Friendship Day is upon us and while the world is busy soaking in the
commercialisation of this occasion, take a minute or two to understand
the deeper meaning of this bond. Imagine your world without friends —
no one to share your chocolates with in kindergarten, no reassuring
shoulder to lean on when your first crush broke your heart or when the
board exam results were out, no one to go college-scouting with, to
share the jitters of your first love, no sounding board that
understands perfectly well how unreasonable parents can be sometimes…
Hard to imagine any or even one of these? "Friendship is," writes Joan
Chittister, "in the end, always and everywhere eternal mystery,
eternal desire. It is a grasp at the ultimate, the quest for human
understanding."
Right from the times of the Mahabharata and Ramayana, even in
scriptures like the Bible, the value and importance of friendship has
been explored and pondered over in great detail. The Bible, for
instance, believes that real friendship looks at the heart and not the
'packaging'. Genuine friendship loves for love's sake, not just for
what it can get in return. True friendship is both challenging and
exciting. It risks, it overlooks faults, and it loves unconditionally,
but it also involves being truthful, even though it may hurt.
Genuine friendship, also called "agape" love, comes from the Lord.
Jesus Christ often told his followers that it is important to cherish
and hold dear true friends because they are very rare and hard to find
in this world. A true friend will allow one the freedom of choice,
accountability, truth and forgiveness. There is a significant example
from the Bible about the bond shared by Peter and Jesus — the former
is afraid for his life after Jesus is led away from the Garden of
Gethsemane and he denies knowing Jesus. As He is led away by His
accusers, Jesus casts a look toward Peter that says, "I knew you would
deny Me, and I forgive you."
Another example is the friendship shared by David and Jonathan. These
two friends were so strong that they could trust each other with their
lives, this wasn't blind faith and trust but they genuinely cared for
each other.
David was running for his life from Jonathan's father, Saul. Jonathan
recognised that David was innocent. Because of the true friendship
they shared, David survived Saul's assassination attempts and went on
to become one of Israel's greatest kings.
In the Ramayana, one of the finest examples of friendship is the bond
shared by Lord Ram and Hanuman. The two met each other when Ram was in
a 14-year exile, as ordered by his father, from the kingdom of
Ayodhya. At that point in time, Ram was searching for his wife Sita,
who was kidnapped by Ravan in Lanka. Hanuman and his group offered to
help Ram in his search and ultimately helped him find his wife. It is
said that during this time Ram and Hanuman became inseparable. Legend
has it that Hanuman had the power to defeat Ravan on his own, but he
chose to stay in the sidelines because he wanted his friend to take
the rightful credit for it.
Friendship is also one emotion that transcends the barriers of
religion, caste, creed, colour, etc. One of the best examples of
friendship that goes beyond physical barriers is the one between Lord
Krishna and Sudama, a poor Brahmin man with rich values. Even when he
didn't have enough to feed his family, he came with a token offering
for Krishna, who in turn received him with complete pomp and splendour
at Dwaraka. So much so that Krishna even washed his feet to welcome
him, an act that amazed all those present.
In the Mahabharata, Bhishma lectures Yudhisthira about the types of
friends a ruler has.
* 'Natural' friends, who share a similar temperament with you or
belong to your family.
* Friends whose ancestors have been loyal to your family.
* Friends with whom you share a relationship of mutual profit.
* 'Contrived' friends, who you can pay to follow you.
Then he talks about a rare class of friends — the dharmatma (righteous
soul). Though everyone may wish to have a few righteous friends, they
are not someone you can easily search for. Also, once you find them,
they are not permanent. So no matter which of these four friends you
have, cherish the ones you have. They're special and irreplaceable.
The author is a scholar on philosophy and has written papers on world
religion
--
Truth resides in every human heart, and one has to search for it there, and to be guided by truth as one sees it. But no one has a right to coerce others to act according to his own view of truth. - Mohandas Gandhi
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